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Moral Dilemma on First Grader Comment

Moral Dilemma on First Grader Comment

My daughter came home and told me that her friend said something yucky that bothered her. The comment was worrisome: either an indication of a need for attention or an indication of abuse. Should I call the mom (I know her but not well) or the teacher? I don’t want to insult the mom and am not sure how to position it… And if there are serious problems, then it might be best for an outsider like a teacher to be aware to watch for other warning signs? Thoughts?

Comments

  1. Sounds like a sticky situation. I would try to speak to the mom first before going to the teacher. I am not sure what type of comment it was- but generally, kids talk about things they have heard, watched, or have experienced. If your daughter’s friend is saying things that are not appropriate for her age and give you a feeling of potential abuse, don’t let it go by. Try to talk to the mom from a nonjudgmental, concerned stance and let her know her options- to talk to her daughter, or have a professional speak with her, monitor how she’s acting/saying and who she is spending time with when mom is not there. Let her know that these comments worry you because to you (since I don’t know what was said, I cannot give you my professional opinion) it sounds like she is asking for help and that these comments should not be ignored. Teachers are mandated reporters of abuse so perhaps after speaking with the mom, then speak with the teacher. https://www.childwelfare.gov/topics/systemwide/laws-policies/statutes/manda/

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    1. Thank you! The comment was concerning by anyone’s standards… I am going to call tomorrow when I know she is off work and at home.

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