Coronavirus in the United States: Should parents worry?
An outbreak of a new strain of Coronavirus (2019-nCoV), first identified in the Hubei Province of China, is causing fears across the globe as people worry about a pandemic of respiratory illness. Read More »
Sleep and Sex After Baby
I want to take this opportunity to talk about the relationship between sleep and sex.
Most women don’t get enough sleep. It’s recommended that we get between seven to nine hours every night. This is really important because when we don’t get enough sleep, our levels of cortisol in the body rise, and cortisol is unhealthy.
Elevated cortisol decreases our desire for sex, increases our appetite, and really changes the chemistry in our blood to make us more unhealthy. So it’s really important to find strategies to increase our quality sleep at night.
I’ve got three strategies to discuss with you. The first is that I want you to find the pockets in your day that are wasted. This might include sitting in carpool line, doing nothing, just waiting and listening to the radio. Or maybe you’re scrolling mindlessly on social media. Or maybe you’re watching an hour or two of TV at night.
These are all pockets of time that could be used to be productive or to sleep. If you really need to unwind at the end of your busy day, you would be better served by going inward and maybe reading a book or journaling, and then getting to bed earlier.
The second way to really help your sleep is to uncouple sleep and sex. A lot of times, as busy women, our days and our brains are structured like this: busy, busy, busy, busy, busy, sex, sleep, just like that. Because the sex is so close to the sleep, we get angry or annoyed about the sex because we actually just want to get to sleep, we’re tired. Or it might actually be taking away the time you’re sleeping and you’re annoyed about that too. Uncouple the two so there’s not a negative reaction to it so close to bedtime.
The last approach is to really set yourself up for success by making a sleep ritual every night. This would include turning off all electronics an hour before bedtime. Electronics, including our TVs, computers, and phones, all emit blue light, which keeps our brains activated. What we really need is red light, like from a candle or a fire. That tells our brain, “Okay, it’s time for bed,” and it starts to make melatonin, which helps us to drift into a natural sleep. So turn off the electronics and institute rituals like taking a bath or some aroma therapy.
Just like we would do for a baby, these extra cues help us know that, hey, the next thing that comes is sleep. That way, we can turn our brains off and go into deep, natural sleep.
I hope you can take some of these things we’ve talked about today and institute them in your life so that, not only can you have a healthier overall life, but also a healthier sex life.
How pregnancy affects your sex drive
I want to talk about pregnancy and libido. Unfortunately, pregnancy seems a lot more glamorous than it actually is—and the same is true for our sexual function. There’s this myth out there that, for some reason in pregnancy, libido goes wild, and you’ll want sex and it will be fabulous. Read More »
“Dear moms of little kids” (how to maintain intimacy)
In this video, I want to talk to all my mommas of little kids. I am a momma of little kids, ages three, five, and eight. I have been there, and I know exactly what you’re going through. I’m going through it now too. Read More »
Birth control and libido
In this video, we’re going to talk about birth control and how it might be affecting your desire. I love birth control. I think the fact that women get to choose when and when not to have a baby is so exciting, and it makes such a difference in our lives and in the lives of women everywhere, so I definitely don’t want to be seen as bashing birth control. Read More »
How to deal with your baby’s first illness
Your baby’s first cold can be unsettling, but there are steps you can take to hold this first brush with infection off as long as possible.
Dr. Google is not your friend
Dr. Google is not your friend.
Now, before you send me hate mail about how doctors just want to deprive you of information in order to make more money, let me clarify. Google has a place in all of our lives. Not a day goes by that I don’t Google something or other. All I’m saying is that Dr. Google does not always serve us well. Read More »
Halloween treats: How much candy should your child get?